The State of Flying
Posted by Andrew | Filed under Business
As many of you know, I went to visit family in the Seattle area for a few days last week before going to Utah for my Orientation at the U. Well, I flew one of my least favorite airliners to Seattle, of which I won’t name but it begins with “U” and rhymes with “spited.” Well actually, I was having a pleasant experience for once. I had a spacious window seat in a CRJ jet from Manchester, NH to Washington Dulles, and a “Premium Economy” seat from Dulles to Chicago O’Hare. Well, at O’Hare, Spited gave me a chance to get free tickets if I agreed to get bumped to another flight to Seattle on a rival airline leaving an hour later. I won’t name the rival airline but it shares an acronym with a support network for Alcohol abusers.
Well, I happen to like flying Alcoholics Anonymous, so I agreed and got a free round trip to anywhere in the lower 48. I also figured that anything would be better than what would be a middle seat on a Boeing 757, a plane that should not exist. Being in the middle seat of a 757 for 4 hours is like sitting on a barstool for 4 hours with 300 pound man sitting on your lap. The only catch was, I had 20 minutes to get to the next terminal over. Doesn’t sound like a big deal to someone who doesn’t travel much, but usually it is a complete nightmare. But, that’s another rant for another time. My question to you, the reader, what is the definition of irony?
Well, irony is getting out of what could be a bad situation (like a middle seat on a 757 for 4 hours) and ending up in an even worse situation. When I got to the gate (“Hi, my name is Andrew Davis, and I’m a passenger”) and found that I now had a middle seat on an MD-80. Not only that, but it had rust on the wings and when the engines started up, it sounded like a 20 year old Chevy pick-up with a bad ignition. How are those freaking things still in service? When we landed at SeaTac, I crossed myself, praised Allah and Yahweh, and said many prayers of gratitude. I looked at pity at the people who were waiting in the terminal to take that same plane to San Jose.
Why is it that we spend literally hundreds of dollars flying across the country only to have to make three or four stops, sometimes in cities that aren’t even on the way to your final destination, in planes 20 years old and rusting, either baking like an oven or freezing your fingers off, and if you want a blanket, it’ll cost you ten bucks. You don’t get a personal entertainment system, you don’t get nuts, and you have limited drink choices. Where is all that money going? I know they have to pay for fuel and personnel, but they seriously have no money left over for maintenance and updating their aircraft? Just mull it over next time you lose the feeling in your knees while some kid kicks the back of your chair.
